Ever feel like you can't do anything right?
I work on organizing the office, but i leave the storage room unlocked which holds valuable silks and artifacts (unknown to me until the lengthly lecture), i wash the dishes but load them wrong, (pots are misplaced, glasses are missing the 1 inch space perimeter, large utensils are to be on the bottom, ETC), i sweep the studio for The Guru and her student while they're stretching before the lesson and am scolded "i don't think that's very respectful" by the student when i pause with a pile of dirt a few feet in front of the god sculpture, (i apologized and said i didn't know), i fetch the tapes and sit down at the workshop but its in the wrong place and am sternly corrected, ETC ... My dance looks as shitty as two days ago: my positionings, torso extension, eye work and m u d r a s are inadequate and G u r u j i is obviously unimpressed. I am unimpressed with myself too but also weary of the derisive 30 minute "pep talks". I'm not going to be sheepish anymore! I'm done with being demeaned! Coy and demure were like, so yesterday, not today. Supposedly if i "hadn't left and had stayed like Emiaj i would be dancing mainstage all over the world by now - London, Paris, India." Yeah yeah yeah, blah blah blah... So basically what i'm saying is I SUCK and i would like very much to simply dissapear.
3 comments:
Ouch... well, don't get discouraged, just try harder! :)
After all, there are only so many mistakes you can make before there aren't any more left.
hehehehe!!! oh you are so right!!
THANKS for the chuckle! =)))
Actually, that's advice that I try to follow myself - and that there's only so many mistakes to make - that's experience. :) And believe me, I'm creative enough to come up with some pretty strange mistakes! ;)
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