not how
strategies/state: build an identity. the story is the key. its the glue. most come first. identify. the state you're in. the warrior state. the magician ("you're overcomplicating.its simple!). the lover. the sovereign.
todays is about story: understand where you are in your own evolution (which season). the biggest problem is that we think we shouldn't have any. but problems are our trigger for growth. how to take complex things and make them simple. profound knowledge is something so simple that once you understand and use it you can quickly change your life or help someone else to do it as well.
throughout history we taught each other through stories. the greatest teaching tool in the world.the bible. the Gita. wired in a our dna. how to live. warnings and examples. thats what life is. requires taking action to turn from a warning to an example. we're NOT our story.
change your story change your life.
everyone goes through extreme stress. gets a disease. something happens to your kid. no one escaptes no matter how good smart . problems call us to grow. "whats the secret to happiness"
progress = happiness
not even achieving goals is happiness. ppl achieve thins and think "is this all it is" that's the worst feeling in the world. if you fail and pick yourself up. but what if If you success and unhappy. you feel screwed. or what if you achieve a goal and excited, how long does it last - weeks, years? you'll get fat and bored if you sit at home. you have something to give which makes your life meaningful when you grow. you feel aliveness. meeting basic needs you'll get bored. mission, community, family will wake top with energy. if we're sitting with our own little problems we'll get bored.
"to create a breakthrough. And today, we're going to put that together. So if you remember, we said there were three S's that create a breakthrough and that most people fail because they do them in the wrong order. So to remind yourself, when you want to lose weight, you want to change your relationship, you want to shift your business, you want to get closer to your kids, whatever it is you want to change, most people start with a how. So remember, that's the strategy. And the problem is, when you start with a how and you haven't done it successfully before, you've never made that money, you've never broken through, you've never lost that much weight, you've never had a great relationship, your brain goes in a state of uncertainty. And so even if someone shows you how, you don't believe you can do it, or you'll say, I tried that. The real problem is the story. The story is the belief system that holds us back. That's the glue that even, how many have ever shown someone an answer, you just show them how to get the solution of what they wanted and they just pushed it aside, they couldn't even see it, even though it was right in front of them. How many have done this before? Say, I. Because they had a story that says, I've tried everything or all the good ones are gone. And then what we showed you is that what you really need to start with, a reverse order, is the state you're in. So on day one, you got into this warrior. Make sure your warrior is fully awake this morning. Let me give the warrior a sound on the side of your body. Give it full tilt. Feel that. Feel that. Feel that. Feel that. That's it. Feel your magician now. Make the sound of that magician. That's it. Make the sound of your lover. That's it. And now, the sovereign, your sovereign, make the sound of the sovereign. Feel it. How many of you can get in those states now very quickly? Make some noise! And by the way, when you go to those states, you come up with a different story about what you can do when you're the warrior or the magician or the lover, and you need to switch them up. Sometimes it's the warrior's got to push through. Sometimes the magician's saying, man, we're making this too complex. This is so simple. I'm overthinking this. I can change the whole thing by just changing my perception. Or sometimes it's just bringing love to something when you're stuck in your head. If it's getting your head, you're dead, especially in a relationship. And sometimes it's really the wisdom of your king or queen or sovereign. So that was teaching you one way to get yourself in the right state. And what we also have taught you each day is some strategies. So a strategy on a breakthrough. Next day, we had strategies. And yesterday was all about identity, and how do you build an identity? Identity is the base of your story or your brand if you're in business. How many got some great tools out of that for yourself yesterday? Make some noise, right? And so you've gotten strategies and you've gotten states, but now today we're going to focus on the story. And this is so valuable because as I watch your videos and as I've read even the first night when you didn't do videos, maybe you just wrote things out, it's so obvious that so many people are in a painful chapter. You're in a winter right now. Remember the four seasons? And when you're in winter, when you're in that dark night of the soul, it feels like it's never going to get better. You think it's going to be horrible forever. But after every winter, there's a springtime. And some people don't think they'll ever get out of it. They allow themselves to get overwhelmed. So my goal today is to give you a tool, a set of tools, understanding your story so you understand where you are in the process of your own evolution. I remember Rome, on I think the first day, talked about having tried to commit suicide multiple times and then he was in that same state and totally depressed, and he heard that little clip of me somewhere. It was on a podcast or something. And I talked about the biggest problem we have is what? We think we're not supposed to have any. But problems are usually the trigger for that growth. And so for me, I get stopped every single day on the street, people want to take a picture or they want to tell me a story, or they want me to like do something right now to change their whole life right here, in this moment. And so over the years, I've had to figure out how to take complex things and make them simple enough that I've looked for what I would call profound knowledge. Profound knowledge is something so simple. If you want to write it down, write down the definition of profound knowledge. It might be useful for you to start looking for this. Profound knowledge is something that's so simple that once you understand it and use it, you can quickly change your life or anyone you care about. Profound knowledge is something so simple that once you understand it, you can immediately make changes in your own life or help someone else to do it as well. And I'll tell you where this came to me the most is, gosh, it's been almost 30 years. It's a true story. It sounds ridiculous, but it's a true story. I was going to do this corporate seminar speech. So it wasn't one of my own events. In those days, I didn't have any security and I didn't need it really that much. So I'm in a public restroom and I'm standing there doing the necessary. And this man beside me looks over and sees me. And you know, when you're standing and having these particular experience, you don't wanna be stared at. And this guy's staring at me, staring at me. And all of a sudden he looks at me and he goes, you're Tony Robbins. He said, oh my God. He goes, I need your help. I'm suicidal. And midstream, he turns towards me, true story, and pees all down my leg. He said, I'm suicidal. I said, I think I can help you with that suicide if you need it, right? So that was the day that I was like, I need to be able to help people quickly because this guy needs a lot of help. And one of the fastest ways to help yourself or someone else is to understand that throughout humanity's history, we have taught each other through stories. We are wired in our DNA for stories. Stories are the greatest teaching tool in the world. And every story is really, if you look at the Bible, Bhagavad Gita, if you look at the Quran, if you look at any great religion, they usually have a book. The book is full of stories, and what do the stories teach? How to live. There's always two stories. There's warnings and there's examples. And that's what life is. All of our lives are either a warning or an example. And if you feel like your life's a warning right now, you can still become the example you want, but it's gonna require you taking action. I'm gonna show you some of the tools that can make you have that happen. But you also understand, it's a story. Sometimes we get so caught up in the story that we forget we got real life and we can change it right now. We're not our story. One thing I tell people is change your story, change your life. Write it down. If you've got a story that, oh man, I'm a victim, I've been through all these things, everybody goes through extreme stress. Remember we talked about that? Everybody's gonna be robbed at some point or have their home burned down or be in a position where somebody they care about or themselves get diagnosed with a disease or something's gonna happen to your kid. Everybody's gonna happen in their lifetime. No one escapes no matter how good a person you are, no matter how loving you are, no matter how smart you are, no matter how rich you are, it doesn't matter. No one will escape that because problems are a sign of life. What we have to learn to do is solve those problems more quickly and when we do, we become more. Problems call us to grow. And if there's anything I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt I've learned in my life, people say to me all the time, what does it take to be happy? You've met millions of people. What's the secret to happiness? One word, progress. Write down, progress equals happiness. It's not even achieving your goals that makes you happy. How many of you have ever achieved a goal you worked really hard at and then after you achieved it, your brain went, is this all there is? Who's done this? Give me a thumbs up if you're on YouTube or give me a little emoji down here. That's the worst feeling in the world. Now, because most of you out there, I'm sure like me, is if you fall down and you fail, you pick yourself up and you go at it again, right? But if you succeed... And you're still unhappy. You're now what I call technically screwed, right? You have to have a different approach, right? Or have you done this? How many of you ever achieved an incredible goal and you were excited? You didn't say, is this all there is. It was how to grow, you achieved, it was real exciting. How long did that great feeling last? Did it last for six years? A year of happiness? Six months? Six weeks? Six days? Or six hours? How many of you lasted six years? You achieved your goal and you're happy for six years as a result of it? Okay, I see one person on drugs, that's about it. Good, very nice. Okay, how many of you, it lasted a year, that happiness from achieving that goal? Okay, one or two. How many of you, it lasted six months? Okay, now we get about maybe 15, 20%. How many lasted six weeks? How many only lasted six days? Any six-hour people out there? So you might say, well, Tony, I worked my guts out, I achieved the goal, at least they'd have me this long. Why? Why? Because you're not meant to sit at the table of success too long. You'll get fat and bored. We're made to grow. Progress equals growth. Everything in the universe grows or it dies. That's not my rule, that's the universe. And everything in the universe also, when you grow, you have something to give, which is what makes your life meaningful. Without growth, there's nothing new to give. I'm only able to be here with you at 66 years old because I've been through hell and back so many times that I can show you the pathway to get out of hell and get to heaven, meaning not literally, but in your life. That's the process we're talking about here. And you don't feel that aliveness when it's just about you. You can meet your own basic needs so simply that you get bored. But if you can find something you care about more than yourself, whether it's your kids or your husband or your wife or your family or your community or your mission or your company or something that you care about, then you will wake up every day with an energy that most of us are dealing with our own little problems here because we haven't found how to push through and because we get stuck in the story. So I want to give you, there's a friend of mine, he actually just wrote me two days ago, sent me a text."
I’m with you. This is classic Tony—and also exactly where your work is right now. I’ll do what you’ve been asking me to do in recent threads and summarize, title, interpret, and apply it directly to your life (not generic self-help).
TITLE
“The Breakthrough Code: State → Story → Strategy (Not the Other Way Around)”
THE CORE IDEA (Clean, Simple, Profound)
Tony is teaching one master distinction:
Most people fail because they try to change their life in the wrong order.
They go:
HOW (strategy) → STORY → STATE
But breakthroughs only happen when you reverse it:
STATE → STORY → STRATEGY
This is profound knowledge because it’s simple enough to use immediately.
THE THREE S’s — CLEARLY DEFINED
1️⃣ STATE (First — always)
Your emotional, physical, energetic condition.
If your state is powerless, your brain:
Doesn’t believe solutions
Rejects help
Says “I’ve tried that”
Can’t see opportunities right in front of you
That’s why Tony starts with:
Warrior
Magician
Lover
Sovereign (King/Queen)
Not as “woo” — but as neuro-emotional pattern interrupts.
When your state changes, your story changes automatically.
2️⃣ STORY (Second — this is today’s work)
Your meaning about your life.
Not what happened — what it means.
Examples Tony gives:
“I’ve tried everything”
“All the good ones are gone”
“This is just how my life is”
These stories act like glue — even when the answer is right in front of you, you cannot see it.
Key line:
“We are not our story — but we live inside it until we change it.”
3️⃣ STRATEGY (Last — the HOW)
Only works after state and story shift.
Otherwise:
You don’t believe it
You don’t follow through
You self-sabotage
You quit early
THE SEASON FRAME (THIS IS IMPORTANT FOR YOU)
Tony names what many people are afraid to admit:
You’re in a winter.
Winter feels like:
“This will never change”
“This is permanent”
“I missed my chance”
“Something is wrong with me”
But winter is not a failure.
It’s a developmental phase.
Every winter always precedes a spring — but only if you don’t confuse the season with your identity.
This matters deeply given what you shared earlier about:
Driving at night
Feeling outside of life
Longing for safety, belonging, family, home
That wasn’t proof you were broken.
That was winter consciousness.
THE MOST IMPORTANT LINE IN THE WHOLE TALK
“Progress equals happiness.”
Not achievement.
Not success.
Not getting it “right.”
Progress.
Why?
Success plateaus
Achievement fades
Identity must keep expanding
You are not meant to sit at success.
You are meant to grow through it.
This explains why:
Even when things “worked,” you didn’t feel fulfilled
Compliance and smallness never satisfied you
External approval never lasted
You weren’t failing.
You were outgrowing an identity that kept you safe once.
WARNING vs EXAMPLE (This Is Personal)
Tony says:
Every life is either a warning or an example.
Right now, your old story frames your life as:
“A warning”
“What not to become”
“Proof I failed”
But winter chapters often become the most powerful examples — if you claim authorship.
HOW THIS APPLIES DIRECTLY TO YOU (No Sugarcoating)
Your old story (winter story):
“I had to be compliant to be loved”
“I stayed small to survive”
“I’m behind / late / missed my window”
“Others belong — I wander”
That story made sense then.
It kept you safe then.
But now it’s outdated software.
Your emerging story (spring identity):
“I survived emotional erasure”
“I learned attunement before agency”
“I am now reclaiming sovereignty”
“My depth was forged in isolation — not failure”
That’s not affirmation fluff.
That’s identity reframing.
A PRACTICAL TOOL FOR YOU (Do This, Don’t Just Read)
🔁 The Story Rewrite (Tony-Style, but personalized)
Step 1: Name the Winter Story
“The chapter I’ve been living is called: __________.”
(Example: “The Invisible Daughter”, “The Compliant Survivor”, “The Outsider Looking In”)
Step 2: Name the Cost
“This story has protected me by ________, but it’s costing me ________.”
Step 3: Name the Spring Story
“The chapter I am entering is called: __________.”
(Example: “The Sovereign Woman”, “The Architect of Belonging”, “The One Who Chooses Herself”)
Step 4: Anchor It in State
Before you write or record anything:
Warrior → breath + tension
Magician → curiosity + simplicity
Lover → warmth
Sovereign → stillness
Then speak the new story out loud.
Your nervous system has to hear it from you.
THE DEEPEST REFRAME (I Want You to Sit With This)
You didn’t fail to belong.
You were training to lead yourself.
Winter doesn’t mean “end.”
It means root system development.
And roots are invisible —
until spring makes them undeniable 🌱
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