Did it have been a habit you wanted to get rid of? And then most importantly, why in that moment did you finally change? Why in that moment? What triggered you in that moment to really make it happen? And then finally, what made it last? Did you have a new belief? Did you bring a different level of emotional intensity? What emotion was it? New belief about what was possible? Did you meet somebody? Did you get a strategy that you never had before that showed you how to do it? And how did that change your life for the better? Elaine says, weight loss. I lost 70 kilograms. Breakthrough is listening to personal power. Nice. Created change 24 years ago. That's nice, Elaine. It was an internal voice, says Dawn. I had a big loss in trading my family and it made me change. Jack Freeman says, I gave up the idea. Oh, it went so fast I couldn't see it. Smoking for Lucy. I feel like I lost meaning in my office job and I found a new meaning in the movement and dance. Very nice, Avram. At 50, I was out of breath during a sparring kickboxing nigga. Changed my whole life. I got fit. I made a decision, Dawn Morale says. I left an abusive marriage. But what made you leave then? But for, you probably were in an abusive marriage for a while. What made you leave that moment? I've been diagnosed with a chronic arthritis at 30. I was able to walk and I changed everything and I'm fine today. Beautiful. I saw my real value. Prayer is what triggered it. Nice. Went to an event. Nice to see that. Alcoholism. I'm really unsure. Well, you don't have to know for sure, but make a decision. What do you think it was? Believing and loving myself. Open heart surgery is what made me finally do it. I woke up believing I deserved this life. Wow, that's gorgeous. I stopped drinking alcohol. I was waking up with a black dog and bad anxiety. I see the world more clearly now. Better decisions changed me. I lost 25 pounds due to, uh, went too fast. Couldn't read it. Divorce. It triggered and talked to me to my daughter and a strategy I tried to fix. There was no fixing. I made the real change that was necessary. I died and started to exercise. But what made you do it in that moment? You knew about it before that. We've got about 45 seconds. What made you change that moment? How's your life better? What was the moment that made you change? And how is your life better today than ever before because of it? Lost 50 pounds. Recovered from sexual abuse and trauma. Beautiful. Jail did it to me. Wow. Remembering my power through God. Had a stillbirth child and had to believe in something larger than myself to get through. Very nice. I moved to the country with my kids. We knew no one, so we started fresh. Nice! But again, what triggered that moment? What made you finally shift in that moment? Beautiful. 25 seconds left. And right now, how is your life better today than before because of this? And then if you're on Zoom, if you wanna share, raise your hand. I'm gonna call a few people. Raise your hand. I'll call you. I'd like to hear what was the breakthrough you had, what triggered it. Okay, how many are done? Raise your hand if you're done, or give me a thumbs up if you're on YouTube, so I know. Thumbs up out there. Great, great. Okay, let's call on a few people. Let's just reach out and grab somebody for me, and let's throw them up on the big screen here, if you would. There we go. Throw them up. Give them a hand. Your writing of your name is so small, it's hard to read. Is it Rama? Roman. Nice to see you. How are you? Where are you in the world? Oh my God, Tony. I'm from Montreal, Canada. Well, it's very nice to meet you, man. Give it up for Montreal, ladies and gentlemen. Tell me, brother, what was the challenge that you put off, and finally you broke through, and what triggered you that day, that moment, to finally change it? First off, it was you, so I wanna say thank you to you for everything that you do, because your work impacted me in a big way. That's the first thing. Thank you very much. Wow, that makes me... So I tried committing suicide four times, which is a very tough time when it did happen. And at the time when I was trying to commit suicide, my biggest thing was, everything that could go wrong in my life was going wrong. So I was in a lot of pain. I was in a lot of financial stress. I was going through a breakup, no family, no friends, and it was probably the darkest time in my life where I didn't see an outlet no matter what I did. And... What helped me start to have the breakthrough was, I met a therapist, and this is no shade towards therapists, I think therapists are great, but every time I saw a therapist, Tony, I would be pissed off because I would always leave her my office not feeling fixed because I thought a therapist is supposed to help you. And I remember after my last suicide attempt, I took like 50 pills of aspirin, I think it was like half a bottle of vodka, my face swelled up, and I prayed that morning, I just don't wanna wake up. I woke up that morning and I went to the pharmacy, they gave me these drugs called Cipralex, it was the antidepressant, and I was like, okay, you know what, let me start taking these drugs, but they weren't working. And at the time, I didn't really know, I knew who you were, but I never really like studied your work. And there was a podcast you were on one time, and you spoke about, you said something while I was about to take my antidepressants. You said, the biggest problem that most people have is they think they're not supposed to have problems. And when you say that, my first thought was, wait, what did you say? So, because at the time my mindset was, why me? Why is this happening to me? Why have I going through this breakup? Why do I have this problem? Like, my mom's not here, my dad's not here, I have no friends, no family. And then I played it back, and you said, the biggest problem that most people have is they don't think they're supposed to have problems. And the second thing you said was, when people's blueprint, when people have a blueprint of what they want and it doesn't match the reality of what they want, they call that depression. And I know it might sound weird that I'm still in this world. A friend of mine, a therapist, like that, my depression just stopped. It was the weirdest thing. I got my pills, grabbed them, threw them in the toilet, flushed them, and- Congratulations. Yes. In that moment, I threw my pills away and I realized that the question to the answer that I had was that was it because I kept saying, why me? I was a victim to what was happening to me. And I stopped being a victim. And I know it might sound crazy, but I didn't have much money at the time. I was like, how am I going to pay my rent? I just put on my shoes. I went to the first gym in the area that I was in. At the time, I was dating someone and she had kicked me out of her house. Like I couldn't live with her no more. So it's like, where am I going to stay? So I'm literally sleeping on my friend's couch at the time, which was painful, but I said, fuck it. I'm not going to be a victim no more. I just went to the gym, signed up for a gym membership. I just started training. That's what I started to do. And the weirdest thing is that I still have challenges in my life, but I always go back to that point that the biggest problem is people think they're not supposed to have problems. And if I do have a problem, it's okay. This too shall pass. That's the belief I have. This too shall pass. And winter doesn't last forever. Actually, brother, problems are a sign of life. Anybody who's having problems. Like I love it when somebody tells me I'm in business, I have no problems. I go, you are in trouble. Either you're an idiot or you're lying, right? Because problems are what challenge us to grow. And if we have no problems whatsoever, we grow, not what we want is better quality problems though, right? As you get stronger and smarter, better quality. But yeah, I'm so glad that was fantastic. And so what really was what broke you through was new insight, a new truth that superseded your old question. By the way, all of you out there, one of the things I teach, we're not doing it here right now, but maybe we'll touch it on the third day here. See if I can put some in. The questions we ask ourselves control our focus and how we feel. So if you keep asking, what's wrong with me? Why does this always happen to me? You're going to get answers. You're an idiot, right? If you go, how come I can never lose weight? And your brain's gonna cause you a pig, right? So if you ask a lousy question, you get a lousy answer. But if you ask a quality question, you'll get a quality answer. And so you've just changed the whole perspective, but you also did the second thing we're gonna teach this to speak, is you've got to change in what we call your physiology, the way you move, the way you breathe. When you work out and you push yourself like that, there's an inner strength that you start to feel, and that changes the way your mind works as well. I'm so inspired and thrilled. I mean, this is wonderful. Thank you for sharing this with us. And Rob, I wanna meet you personally. So I'm gonna ask my team to invite you. You're gonna come to my Unleash the Power Within seminars as my guest. I'm gonna bring you up there. I'd love to meet you, man. I'll see you then. All right? God bless you. I'm gonna take you to the next level. I look forward to meeting you personally, brother.
This is the emotional apex of the whole sequence. And it’s important to slow it down, because what just happened there is not “motivation” — it’s pattern interruption at the identity level.
I’m going to hold this carefully and cleanly, because there’s real human gravity in what Roman shared.
1. What actually triggered the breakthrough (not what it looked like)
On the surface, it sounds like:
a podcast quote
a new insight
a reframed belief
But that’s not what changed his life.
The trigger was this moment:
The collapse of the victim question.
He didn’t just hear a new idea.
He lost belief in the old framing:
“Why is this happening to me?”
That question had been organizing his entire nervous system.
When that question died, the emotional architecture underneath it collapsed.
That’s why the depression “stopped” suddenly.
Not because pain vanished — but because meaning changed.
2. The critical shift: from “I need fixing” → “I need movement”
Notice this detail — it’s huge:
He kept leaving therapy angry because:
“I didn’t feel fixed.”
That tells you everything.
His system didn’t need explanation.
It needed agency.
The moment he:
threw away the pills
put on his shoes
went to the gym
he wasn’t “getting fit.”
He was proving to his nervous system that he could act.
Action restored dignity.
Dignity restored hope.
Hope restored momentum.
That sequence matters.
3. Why the belief “this too shall pass” works (and why it’s not denial)
“This too shall pass” is not optimism.
It’s temporal reframing.
Depression collapses time into:
“This is forever.”
That belief is unbearable.
The moment time re-expands:
“This state is temporary.”
The nervous system can endure pain without panicking.
That’s not Tony Robbins magic.
That’s survival biology.
4. The real teaching hidden in this exchange
Tony says it explicitly, but it deserves a spotlight:
The questions you ask determine the answers you live in.
This isn’t metaphorical.
Your brain is a search engine.
Ask:
“What’s wrong with me?” → pathology
“Why does this always happen to me?” → helplessness
“How could this serve me?” → agency
“What’s one move I can make today?” → momentum
Roman didn’t “become positive.”
He changed the query.
5. Why physiology sealed the change (and made it last)
Insight opened the door.
Physiology locked it in.
Working out did three things simultaneously:
Gave him proof of strength
Regulated stress hormones
Re-associated pain with progress instead of danger
That’s why it lasted.
Beliefs fade.
Embodied habits don’t.
6. Why this moment lands so hard for you (and why you’re tracking it)
You’re not just listening to a story of recovery.
You’re watching:
the exact second meaning flips
how action follows immediately
how “lasting change” always has a behavioral anchor
This isn’t about suicide.
This is about threshold moments.
The moment someone says:
“I’m done asking the question that keeps me powerless.”
Everything after that is logistics.
7. The quiet, non-negotiable truth underneath all of this
Here it is — no hype, no spectacle:
People don’t change when life hurts enough.
They change when the meaning of the hurt becomes intolerable.
That’s the moment.
That’s the breakthrough.
That’s what you just witnessed.
I’ll leave you with a grounded mirror — not a push:
If you look at your own life right now,
is there a question you’ve been asking for years that might be keeping you stuck?
Not a habit.
Not a behavior.
A question.
Because changing that is often the real first move.
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