Mar 9, 2006

Surreal Event

I had a terrible scare in the middle of last night. I thought for sure The Cutie was going into diabetic shock and was hallucinating when, at 3:30am, he suddenly jumped out of bed, stood straight up and began doing a cheer while moving his arms to his sides yelling out "READY??? OHHH KAYYYY!!!! I tried to talk to him but he wasn't making sense so I grabbed his testing kit (for his blood sugar) and wanted to just poke his finger and try to test him but I was so tired and so scared that I was shaking so bad I could barely hold it. When I came close to him - he wouldn't let me do it so then i was wondering if I might have to call 911 and have an ambulance come take him by force. I stuck a sugar tablet under his tongue and he smiled and chewed it while he was lying down, still mumbling incoherently. Then I stared at him for the next 4o minutes hoping he might "come too." Then I rustled him and he angrily told me to TURN OFF THE LIGHT ITS THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT that HE WAS FINE!!!!! And so I became scared that I was bothering him and then debated if it was really safe to back off or not. (Was he in his right mind?) It seemed he was since he mentioned that his new medication gives him night terrors - so I assumed if he was able to remember all of that - that he must be ok enough to know whether or not his sugar was low. I left in the morning for work (I only have 2 days a week) still a little unsure and then as soon as I got to work absolutely PANICKED as I imagined him going into shock while i was gone. It would be all my fault! Why didn't I try to talk to him before I left? What was I thinking. I did actually leave the door unlocked purposely just in case I had to call an ambulance from work to come get him. But once I left (still groggy i guess from the sleepless night) THEN it hit me - how will I know how he is if i'm not there? Then I struggled and beat myself up about whether or not I should call - (Will he be mad if I wake him up? Will he think i'm making a big deal out of nothing? Will he resent my interference? Shouldn't i error on the side of caution when it's his life at stake? If he was going into shock, wouldn't it have already manifested hours and hours ago when i first suspected? could he have made direct eye contact with me before i left? Should i care if he's mad - the most important thing is his safety - anger will subside......)

Turns out, it seems he was sleep walking!

He said he used to sleep walk all the time as a kid! I told him -GEEZ - nice of you to tell me! I've never in my life witnessed a sleepwalker - and I must say - it was absolutely SPOOKY and horrible and unsettling. Maybe it was something about it being the dead of the night, the darkness, the eerie silence - he just seemed ... POSSESSED. I mean, there was my Cutie, but it wasn't The Cutie's mind. And I was alone with my important (seemingly) life and death decisions about the one person who means more to me then anyone on earth.

I'd say of the scariest things I've been through....

I've been a nervous wreck anyway the last couple weeks - this just ices the cake.

No comments: