Burning

I am mad.
Raging.
Disgusted.
Pissed.
Outraged.
Furious.
Paralyzed. My stomach is in knots. I can feel the presence of impending tears. My chest is doing flip flops. I think i am going to throw up.
I want to run away.
Fuck it and be gone.
How dare he. How could he. What the hell.
Now what do i do.
There is nothing i can do.
Nothing to be said.
No where to go.
Nothing to think.
Its all useless.
It will do no good.
I won't be heard.
The tears will reap no reward.
In fact, expressing my feelings as i was so bold (though terrified) to do yesterday led to many times the cataclysm and an entire day of pain, teaching me well to keep my mouth shut.
No, there will be nothing to turn back time and make it go away now. He's done it and that's that. Permantly emblazened as a chip in my freshly repaired heart. Why should he have to answer to me, afterall. "Its the principle" I don't own him.
I am helpless.
Hurt.
And once again alone in my pain.