funny how cyclical my life seems to be. this blog seems to illuminate it. somehow, now matter what happens, i always seem to come back to a state of indigo blues.
i have things to report. good things. suspiciously good. surprising things. i earned a M.S. a few weeks ago. it was a relatively painless and short process. and most critically, it was free. this bumps my salary. my godly boss, a VP, is heaven sent - supportive, affirming, entirely positive. he filled my head with a school year's worth of praise. so much so, he's practically got me believing it. what have i done to deserve this? strangely, my new coworkers are as equally kind. all of this diminishes the sting of the institutional dysfunction. and infuriating inertia. on the other hand, i've had great opportunity to contribute, and it's been a liberation.
on the difficult western front - the father is not well post transplant. infections. emergency bowel removal. 5 hour iv's and transfusion. my mother, the nurse, is a saint. a saint. on the eastern front are we - connected by just an electronic thread as she updates me day by day, blow by blow
3 comments:
I'm sure your contact via that electronic thread is valued by your loved ones. It's not easy to be apart at times like that, but your spiritual support means much. Glad to hear the home front sounds extremely good.
thanks JM. it's confusing. i have mixed feelings - i feel sorry for him, but yet, still a surprising sense of indifference caused by a lifetime of anger. although i'd like to be more supportive, its actually, more for my mom's sake. i imagine that's considered a shocking thing to say. so, i haven't said it.
It's not shocking at all, but there comes a time when you have to let go of the anger and ambivalence, if not for you at least for your mom. If you wait till it's too late, you'll truly regret it.
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